I sat outside on my porch today for nearly an hour. I just sat their, still, quiet. I felt like the Lord was beckoning me to just stop and be for a while, so I grabbed a book (that I never even opened) and headed outside while the little kids napped and Aidan played on the computer. As I sat I noticed a tree that stands at least 50 feet tall. If you would have asked me about my yard I would have never mentioned that tree and if I did, I never would have given it a fair description.
Its funny that we have lived hear for over 3 years and I have never really even noticed that tree. We live a newer neighborhood, one of those where they clear the ground completely and start fresh. There aren't very many trees and the ones that are here are not very impressive. You would think I would have noticed a tree this size in my very own backyard, but I missed it. It is especially surprising since it is the very tree that has provided shade and protection from the sun for my kids as they play in their sandbox. It is the tree that has provided hours of entertainment with the limbs that it has dropped. Limbs that become impressive swords in the hands of a five year old boy. It is also the very tree that has caused that corner of our yard to remain void of grass because of the shade that it provides.
As I sat there, watching the wind gently blow through the leaves and I looked at the limbs that stretched upward I wondered how much more do I miss? How much of God do I fail to see in the busyness of life? How often do I fail to recognize the majesty of my maker? How long did He sit ready to be noticed, beckoning me with His gentle and not so gentle whispers to take note and look up? Now that I do know Him, now that I am a follower of Jesus Christ, how often do I fail to see His hand in my life? How much of Him do I miss because I don't take the time to stop and be still?
While I was outside there was this bird. It seemed to almost circle me as it jumped from tree to tree to tree. The bird had about 4-5 different tunes it could sing and it proudly chirped them all. I was awed by the Lord's creation. I sat still and I witnessed this bird singing praises to our Lord while this tree danced for God as the wind blew and I could do nothing else but join in with all of creation and praise my Father! And in that moment it was clear to me that I, as a Christian, am simply missing so much.
I wonder sometimes how people can deny a God. How can they not see a God so majestic? How can they hear of Him and not worship Him? Today God showed me...it's as simple as failing to notice the gigantic tree that your kids play under nearly everyday. In the busyness of life it is easy to never stop long enough to notice. I mean they may know He is there, they may even talk to Him or talk about Him on occasion, but do they know Him? Do they recognize how Big He is? I knew that tree was there, but I had never recognized the grandeur of it. I had never sat there, knowing my smallness and admiring its size.
Today, I wept. I wept for the person who may claim to know God, but because they don't understand how big and trustworthy God is and just how small and incapable they are, they miss freedom, they miss peace, they miss rest, and comfort, and true purpose. I wept for the person who has never even met God, who does not even realize that He really is there and He really is Good. And today I wept for myself. I wept because even though I know my Lord, so often I miss Him. I miss opportunities to worship Him. I get caught up in me, I get tired, and weary. I forget just who it is I know. I fail to realize just how big He is.